Seventeen Cats on a Red Brick Road

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Adventures in airport security…

My bro Maya and I were going through security, leaving Cleveland after surgery. All our carry-on baggage, laptops, shoes, jackets, scarves, little nerdy pins, small change, etc. were separated out, placed in tubs and sent through the scanner. The sleeves of my shirt are rolled to the elbow, and I am still wearing my hospital bracelet.

We were sent to a separate scanner - not a metal detector or an X-ray scanner, but a millimetre wave scanner. I don’t really mind - this happened on the way here, and electromagnets are cool.

I told them I couldn’t put my hands up all the way because had I just had surgery; they said that was okay, to just put them up as best I could. Maya later told me that they had a second agent come up to the machine as soon as I said I couldn’t raise my arms.

The scan came back suspicious. Sigh. Highlighted areas on my right hip and centre of my chest. They pulled me off to the side, away from the queue - by about two or three feet, so we were still in the open.

Right hip was a metal grommet on my pocket - Maya has similar detailing on her jeans which is apparently not suspicious (the steel wires and hooks on her bra didn’t set off the scanner, either). Besides that, I’d worn these same jeans on the plane coming to Cleveland, been through the same scanner, and they hadn’t been flagged. Colour me confused.

Centre of my chest was of course the surgical binder. Sigh a little, because the nurse had told us their out-of-town patients haven’t had any trouble getting through security. At this point I expected they’d take a glance and send me on my way. Nope.

I opened the top two buttons of my shirt and show her the zipper. She looked perplexed. Asked how far down it went. I poked the bottom edge of it, though my shirt, and told her it came down to my waist.

She looked at it concernedly. Asked where I was sore. I told her at the sides of my chest, not wanting to go into the details of periareolar surgeries right that second - I was under the assumption that stating I’d had surgery on my chest - and my flat chest - would explain what was going on without me me having to sit down and have a chat about the state of my nipples.

I unbuttoned my shirt to the bottom of it; she ran the back of her hand along the zipper. Said she found nothing concerning. Told me to hold on for a bit.
Pulled me over to the scanner for explosive materials - still out in the open. Told me me to press the zipper against my chest (mercifully not bruised…?) and run my fingers down it. Swabed the zipper, then swabed my hands. Didn’t swab the hospital bracelet, though.

The scan found nothing suspicious.

She looked at me concernedly.

Asked me ‘…Do you /need/ to keep it on…?’ I told her yes, it’s holding on dressings and pressing down swelling, and I need to keep it on for two more weeks, doctor’s orders. Definitely did not mention that I could technically take it off for short periods because there is no way I could have managed to take it off or put it back on without some assistance, at least, and we were, of course, still in security trying to get on our flight.

She told me to stay there. Went and got a colleague.

Colleague repeated the stare-at-the-binder-concernedly routine. I unbuttoned my shirt again to show them the bottom of the zipper. Colleauge put on gloves. Ran her hand down the zipper. Found nothing suspicious. Asked me where the incisions are. I repeated that to her. She looked at my chest, probably trying to use her X-ray vision to get at my nipples. Seemed perturbed by not actually having X-ray vision to look at my nipples.

Maya, who had been hovering nearby, detailed the arrangement of gauze padding under the binder. Mentioned there are hooks beneath the zipper. Second agent looked alarmed, asked ‘…hooks?!’

I heard Maya sigh. ‘Hook-and-eye closures. Fasteners. Little clips.’ Second agent looked at Maya suspiciously. Looked at my chest and the hand that touched it nervously.

She pulled the first agent aside, still nearby, exchanging glances for a minute or two. The first told the second she didn’t find anything, hesitantly. The second looked from the first to the binder to my face to the binder and back to the first. I stood wonderin if they were just disappointed that the only interesting thing they’ve seen all day is completely innocuous. They looked at me suspiciously, and the second said to the first ‘I guess we can let [pronoun redacted] go…?’ The first looked at her colleague and then back to me, and said slowly ‘You’re… good… to go?’ Finally. I buttoned my shirt and Maya and I discussed how glad we were we came early.

Public enemy number one, right here.

— 1 year ago with 116 notes
#trans  #ftm  #TSA  #airport security  #transgender 
  1. ryokolovesyou reblogged this from 26021992
  2. my-pleasant-good-morning reblogged this from raeosunshine
  3. super-hobbit reblogged this from gilboob
  4. fedorarara reblogged this from raeosunshine
  5. encaligineveritas reblogged this from 26021992
  6. newfriendly reblogged this from maximumbuttitude and added:
    Jesus christ the TSA are morons.
  7. dagontreadswater reblogged this from 26021992 and added:
    Yeah, it’s been out of hand for awhile now. Forcing 95 year old ladies out of wheelchairs to take their diapers off and...
  8. 26021992 reblogged this from kanikkers and added:
    I understand the need for some form of airline security (though I have some sincere doubts that the systems in place do...
  9. dragonprinceofdreams reblogged this from 26021992
  10. bannanachan reblogged this from hulklinging and added:
    signal boost because wtf :/
  11. starbob-omb reblogged this from hulklinging and added:
    well, if he doesn’t look like a danger...society i don’t know who does. *insert eye roll...
  12. kanikkers reblogged this from 26021992 and added:
    this situation really sucks, and i don’t want to make light of that fact at all. however, it’s important to understand a...
  13. markpenmanship reblogged this from feeshed and added:
    wow, they’re dumb.
  14. ohnospacey reblogged this from incoherentelegy
  15. oyasumiseki reblogged this from laits-go
  16. mintofhint reblogged this from gilboob
  17. smashingevilbunnyheads reblogged this from malignance
  18. gilboob reblogged this from actualherooftwilight
  19. finalprocrastinator reblogged this from maximumbuttitude
  20. stelacestine reblogged this from 26021992
  21. davesproot reblogged this from maximumbuttitude
  22. psygy reblogged this from 26021992
  23. plasticoctopus reblogged this from maximumbuttitude
  24. batterbitchin reblogged this from maximumbuttitude
  25. whycantyouallbeliterate reblogged this from 26021992 and added:
    friend. Nobody likes TSA,...even TSA. So, what da fuq brah?
  26. actualherooftwilight reblogged this from maximumbuttitude and added:
  27. bellypebbles reblogged this from maximumbuttitude
  28. maximumbuttitude reblogged this from hulklinging and added:
    !! IMPORTANT !!
  29. otomatonom reblogged this from blooper-boy
  30. jaegerleesi reblogged this from feeshed and added:
    This is horrible, and I’m so sorry
  31. blooper-boy reblogged this from hulklinging
  32. feeshed reblogged this from hulklinging
  33. incoherentelegy reblogged this from redeadlauren
  34. laits-go reblogged this from redeadlauren
  35. redeadlauren reblogged this from hulklinging
  36. hulklinging reblogged this from 26021992 and added:
    Reblogging again because it needs to be seen. The more people that are aware of this problem, the better.